Ah!!!! Okay. i finally got my results for my SPM exams on monday.. So great! i actually did well in it. i can hardly believe it. Till today, i still think i'm dreaming. it's like, this has been what i've been wishing for, for the whole of this year and last year. Can't believe i actually got it. OOHHHH.... *jumps up and down* Just cant describe how i felt. Its the most incredible thing! hahah.. Miracle i think.

But i cant say i'm totally happy about it. I am not 100% happy. Well, one of my friends din really hit the target she wanted. Although she only missed on one subject, she was still really disappointed. To tell the truth, i've always been a lil jealous of her for always being smarter than i am. Sometimes, i secretly wished that i would do better than her in this major exam. but, i never really meant it. And now that she did not do as well, i feel terrible for her. I would really prefer that both of us did equally well.. Seriously, i've been expecting her to hit it straight. and not me. Thats y i am saying, it's like miracle.

And another thing, now i am totally LOST! all these while, i have been expecting maybe a couple of missed subjects. so i was thinking that i am sure to be going to Form 6. And if i go to form 6, i din have to decide on my future, so soon. Now, i am going to apply for a few government scholarships which will allow me to go overseas to further my studies and i wont have to pay for my courses. Now i cant decide. Because, the course that i wanted to go for, which is designing, is not available in any of the scholarships. AND everyone will think i am mad if i give up the scholarships now.

So.. i am really really... LOST. i guess i'll just go for anything. medicine, engineering, watever. If i dun get the scholarships, i'll go for form 6. Actually now, i feel like going for form 6. No decisions, and lots of old friends!!! *sigh* if i really do get medicine or something, i think i shud just do my best, and i'll try and get a double degree later in my life. I might not have the time to do it tho, so... *cries out loud* i'll still find my own way to keep my passion alive, i'm sure. *fingers crossed*

*flys away*